Thursday, July 5, 2007

Chapter Two - Unforgiving

I walked to the car with my mother at my side. I was extremely grateful to get away from that freak, Ms. Vauche. I got the impression that my mother was angry at me, but I couldn’t figure out why.
“Mom?”
“Yes, what is it?”
“Why are you mad at me?”
“Mad at you, what-“
I interrupted, “You know that I know that you’re mad at me. Now tell me why.”
“Could you give Ms. Carley a chance? She’s just trying to help us!”
“Are you bloody serious? You’re taking Ms. Vauche’s side? I thought you were with me!”
“She said she would like you to call her Ms. Carley.”
“Hell to that! She is a creep. She is trying to manipulate you!”
“Erik Richards, watch your language. And maybe I just need to have someone manipulate me.”
“You know, I want to live by that lake, but I stood up for you.”
“Are you serious, after what happened? You can’t be serious!”
“Well I am being serious.”
“Oh, and what do you mean you where sticking up for me? Ms. Carley isn’t trying to bring me down.”
“I just, I just don’t trust that woman. She gives me the creeps.”
My mom sighed, almost to suggest that she was trying to put together what she was going to say next. “I’m sorry Erik, but she is who she is. It is more important for me to get away from here than for me to wind up with a bad realtor. At least Carley knows what she is talking about.”
“OK, fine, but just don’t look to me for support, because I won’t be there.” I knew I shouldn’t have said that, but I spoke my mind. I was not in a forgiving state of mind at the moment. She looked like she got the wind knocked out of her.
“I’m sorry you feel that way about her.” That’s all she said for the rest of the way home. And to be quite frank I couldn’t have cared less.
We pulled into the driveway, and I leaped out of the car. It was the middle of the summer, and I was already sweating before I entered the house. That’s when I realized that I would be taking eighth grade in North Carolina. I was almost 14, and this school year was going to be perfect. Susie and I, my girlfriend, where going to have a blast. Now that dream was crushed. I was going to have to tell her I wasn’t going to be here anymore; I dreaded this.
I ran to my room and flopped onto my bed. Our house was small, along with my room. The walls were painted a dull blue color, and my bed spread was black. Even though the theme of the room wasn’t too exciting, my bed was the most comfortable I had ever slept on. I’m not sure why, but it was.
“I think the reason you don’t like Ms. Carley is because you don’t want to leave, and I don’t blame you.” It was my mother’s voice, and she was standing in my doorway.
“Oh yeah? - Well you think what you want to. I just don’t like her, and that’s that.” I didn’t say it, but I think this might be the reason I despise the realtor.
“OK, just please, give her a chance. Like I said, she’s just trying to help.”
“Yeah, whatever.” My mom stood in the doorway for another moment, almost looking like she was waiting for me to say something else. She did not get what she wanted. I was being a brat, and I didn’t care. She left the doorway, and I shut my door.
I was terrified of moving, and everyone seemed to know. Well at least the people that had seen me today. Hell, forget it. Leaving this city was the last thing I would ever want to do. I loved the whole city atmosphere, as did my mom, but the bloody accident changed her mind. Not to mention the beach; we all loved it, but now it was just me. I know my father would have wanted us to stay, but my mother is too much of a pansy.
My head began to hurt, and I mean hurt. The pain seared from the back of my head to the front. It was almost unbearable. I yelled out for help, and my vision blurred. I saw black lines and I became very nauseous. I was falling, but didn’t know which way. I felt myself get sick, and then I hit the ground. I felt as if I had vertigo. I could no longer see. I was unconscious.

“Erik, Erik, Erik!” The last name I heard seemed very loud compared to the others. I could see, blurry at first, but then it cleared out. A saw a close-up of my mother’s face. “Erik!!” She screamed once more.
“What, what is it?” I said, sounding kind of like a stoner.
“You just passed out, dropped cold, fainted, that’s what’s it!” She almost laughed at my so-called crazy statement. Of course I didn’t know I passed out, why the hell do you act like I am crazy for asking.
“Geez, give me a break,” I said, my vision still focusing. “Well now that you so kindly informed me of what happened, how did it happen?” I know I sounded like a brat, but my mom, well she was just being a brat right on back.
“God, why are you treating me this way?!” she scolded. I suddenly felt very bad.
“I’m sorry mom, it’s just that this whole moving thing does terrify me, and to be honest, you’re not making it any better.”
“Well that would explain the migraine.”
“Huh?”
“You get them when you are stressed, worried, and angry. That’s what made you faint.”
“Yeah, that does make sense.” It was quiet for a moment. My mom, she just wasn’t helping at all. I wished I could just go with her, but I was not in the most forgiving mood. “Mom?”
“Yeah, what is it?”
“Can we just pretend that all the arguments we had today didn’t happen? I want us to start on a clean slate.”
“Actually, now that you mention it, I would love to do that.” A thousand pounds off my chest. She hates that question. “May I ask you what you meant when you said, ‘you’re not making it any better’.”
“I just, you just…” I trailed off, trying to gather my thoughts. “I want to move on from his death mom, and your way of doing that is running away from reality. He’s gone, we both very well know that, but leaving what the entire family loved, including him, isn’t helping.”
“Erik, you have to understand. The water, I couldn’t go back.” “You weren’t afraid until the freak incident. Nature is uncontrollable, it could’ve happened to anyone.”
“I know, but it’s not supposed to happen to anyone I love.”
“See mom, that’s what’s bugging me!”
“What?”
“You like to manipulate everything, even freak events like a rip tide, but now that he’s gone, you’ve given up. Now Ms. Varlouse, or what’s her face, is manipulating you. You’ve completely lost all meaning. I hate watching you like this. I don’t like any manipulation, but I’d rather you manipulate yourself, than some ditz trying to control your every move.” I took a deep breath- that was a mouthful.
“Oh.” That’s all she had to say – oh. “Well, I see what you mean. I will assure you that I will not let her manipulate me, but you can’t accuse me of it every time I agree with her.”
“OK. I won’t.”
“Promise?”
“Yes, I promise…” I was cut off. The doorbell. That was one thing in this house that I hated. The bloody doorbell made the most terrible sound. Like feeling-the-cotton-ball-cringe, if you know what I mean.
“I’ll get it,” my mom said. I still followed her down the stairs. It donned on me that my father had been dead for a whole month. The damned funeral got delayed because of who-knows-what.
“Who is it?” I asked, once my mother was able to see through the window to the right of our door.
“Um, it looks like… Oh God.”
“What?” I asked, not liking the tone in my mother’s voice.
“Guess who.”
“Err, could it be that ‘wonderful realtor?’ ”
“You guessed it, and what did I just say?”
“Ok, fine, I’ll give her a bloody chance.” My mom opened the door.
“Why hello!” my mom said.
“Hello Lin, hi sweet-“ She cut off. I assumed that was because she had remembered my no-sweetie-please request. “Erik…” Once again I had nailed her, though this time I wasn’t sure why. It was almost like she thought I knew something about her that she didn’t want me to know. That scared the crap out of me. Why? Well because what the hell does she not want me to know?








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